50 things NOT to do
by glompmeXD
Summary: A list of 50 things sunstreaker and sideswipe are not allowed to do in and out of the base
1. part 1

_Ok guys here's the next fan fic celebrating the last day of my holidays. I May not be able to write very much as I have my exams coming up! So much to study for and these aren't even my finals. Hope you enjoy_

**Sunstreaker and Sideswipe's list of 50 things NOT to on base **

1. Do not give other Autobot's their own theme song - Singing it when they walk in to the room is inappropriate

2. Trying to make prowls logic circuits crash will only put you on monitor duty for a very long time. – This includes announcing that skyfire and Starscream are getting married and that they want him to be a flower girl

3. Don't freak out the humans by screaming "alien invasion" when Cosmos fly's past

4. Don't send Megatron love letters signed by optimus prime, ever!

5. Decepticons are NOT vampires. Stop trying to stake them.

6. Just because soundwave and blaster are cassette players doesn't mean they are meant for each other, so stop trying to set them up on dates.

7. If you are in the same room as each other you are to refrain from using mobile phones, you're standing next to each other for primus sake. - You are also required to pay your own phone bill - and where the slag did you get a mobile phone it's the 1980's they haven't been invented yet

8. Stop replacing jazz's music with Hannah Montana and tailor swifts cd's

9. Red alerts paranoia is no laughing matter so stop playing the air raid siren in his office.

10. Stop filling Ironhide's guns with potatoes and other mixed vegetables

11. Putting bonnets on bumblebee while he is asleep is not amusing - he does not need to be reminded that he is the smallest

12. Either of you caught singing, humming or whistling, the song that never ends, 100 bottles of energon on the wall and I know a song that will get on your nerves, you will be obliterated, offlined and turned into teeny little pieces. – No sideswipe you cannot change the lyrics you still will be punished

13. When in battle optimus screams "Megatron is mine" in battle it does not mean that optimus prime is in love with Megatron. So whoever is playing the wedding music better stop it.

14. Tracks can fly other Autobot cars can't, so Sunstreaker stop pushing them off the top of the volcano

15. Karaoke is strictly banned, do I even need to explain this

16. Starscream is not a femme so stop sending him dresses

17. Ratchet does not talk to his tools so stop drawing faces on them and putting them all over the base

18. We do not celebrate the human holiday Christmas so any mistletoe found on the base shall be burnt... along with the offender

19. Do not paint red alerts room like the Desepticons base while he is asleep

20. Don't write kiss me on optimus primes face mask while he's asleep

21. Sending skyfire love letters signed by Starscream is insensitive

22. Re setting tela trann one to say "welcome back Mrs. Hip hop bob bitang glimmer mc sparkles" whenever optimus asks for an opinion or research, is **not** funny

23. Playing really loud music in the middle of the night is not welcome and the punishment will be dealt by the cranky residents

24. Painting Desepticons on the walls is not appreciated

25. Sending invitations to both Autobot's and Decepticons about a sleeping bag party is only funny the first time

_Ok guys have to stop here. But I will upload the rest later yes there will be 50... Eventually XD_


	2. part 2

_Ok everyone, here's part 2 of the twins list. Please review I would like to hear what you thought of it, but on with the show..._

**Continuation of Sunstreaker and sideswipes list,**

26. Stop taking mirages things and leaving a sign that says 'now you see it now you don't'

27. While it is encouraged to interact with humans selling them deception phrase books is highly frowned upon.

28. Playing the human game tennis is fine, using Wheeljack's inventions as a tennis ball is not.

29. You cannot use jazz's CD's as throwing stars.

30. We also do not celebrate the human holiday Easter so stop putting raw eggs around the base

31. Stop putting laxatives in optimus primes morning energon

32. Crating red alert in a box was only funny the first time and shall not be done again

33. Painting yourselves as each other and trying to convince the dinobots that you are the other twin is not acceptable, they are confused enough already

34. You are not allowed to use the words gumdrops, sugar cane and latex again near huffer

35. Stop writing obscene phrases on preceptor's slides

36. Megg's, Star and Wave's are not appropriate names to call the deception commanders in battle

37. Putting deception propaganda bombs in the rec room is strictly forbidden

38. Stop telling the humans that 'optimus prime enjoys crunchy peanut butter', he does not enjoy finding crates of the stuff in his office as gifts from the humans

39. Asking inferno constantly if he has any peanuts is not funny, just very annoying

40. Whoever is putting grapes in Tela Trann 1 better stop it

41. Jumping out in the middle of an occupied hall and screaming, "Die slaggers!" while open firing on the occupants with a paint gun is not to occur, EVER!

42. There is no such thing as national 'wrap everything in alfoil' day

43. Wearing paper hats does not make you a pirate, so stop stealing prowls pens

44. Changing the channels on the rec room TV to only show over cheery human high school girls will only make Bluestreak want to purge his tanks.

45. Cliffjumper is not spider-man so stop hanging him from the ceiling

46. Changing grapples models so they transform into mini scooters is not funny

47. Warpaths chest is not a washing line so stop hanging human underwear off it

48. Saying 'my granny can walk faster than this' when driving behind a slow car is not appropriate language.  
- Also transformers don't have granny's (I don't know if you realise this)

49. You are not authorised to host transformer Olympics, for obvious reasons  
-doing so will not bring an alliance with the Decepticons  
-also egg and spoon races is not an event

50. Writing fake diary entry's, signing it by other bots and leaving them around the base for other mechs to find will only create awkwardness and tension and is never to happen again

Signed,  
Prowl...  
and other slagged off mechs

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_There you go Sunstreaker and sideswipes list of 50 things NOT to do. Knowing them they will probably need another list! Well thanks for reading___


	3. Bonus

_I just finished re reading this fic and decided to add a extra chapter XD I'll be putting all my stories on hold until November because of uni D: so enjoy this one extra chapter XD_

**In extension to the previous rules:**

When talking to human ambassadors starting every sentence you say with 'according to the prophecy' will only scare them off and is never to be done again.

You are never to play paintball, rugby, badminton, cricket and any other sport inside the base again, ever, period.

When you are bored on patrol don't play 'who can get the closest' especially with human cars.  
-Also if I see you again on any human TV shows like 'Pimp My Ride' I will pull you apart and salvage what's left into toasters.

Convincing the Dinobots that Ratchet is their mother is strictly forbidden  
-As is convincing them Wheeljack is the father  
- No you cant switch the roles around  
-yes I will still be mad

Speak like a pirate day is only a human event and dose not involve cannons and costumes so just stop it.

We do not have Christmas plays so stop selling tickets or I will let the unhappy customers find you

Sneaking into the Decepticon base is acceptable sneaking in to move slumbering mechs to different places and draw on them is not. They already know its you.

Movie night will be band if you keep on recreating scenes  
- especially to mechs who weren't there

Also in accordance to the previous rule these movies are banned: 'Pirates of the Caribbean', 'The Care Bear Movie', 'Jurassic Park', 'The Shining', anything to do with alien invasions, 'Cloudy with a chance of Meatballs' and anything from Monty Python.

No kiwi birds on base. Beachcomber this includes you!  
- Actually no animals of any kind

Photoshoping pictures of mechs together is strictly contraband  
- you may however do this to the Decepticons

Stop spreading rumors! These include 'Hound and Mirage are hooking up while Mirage is invisible' 'Bumblebee's parents are Scrapper and Hoist' and 'Jazz is a femme in disguise'

You are never to use the phrases: "Hey guys watch this", "when I was a lad…", "Have you ever…", "Look Out! It's a distraction", "then there was that time…"

Stage plays are strictly banned. After the Decepticons play we do not need another fiasco so soon after that one.  
-Ratchet is still marred to Starscream and Skyfire is still sulking

Optimus Prime voice changer helmets are hear by banned. Anyway how on earth did you get them so big?

Stop putting cling wrap on Energon cubes and on doorways. Its not funny only annoying and messy.

Having Human fights is against regulations. And so is betting. Also I don't care if humans have Kangaroo fights.

Re programming Smokescreen in his sleep is never to happen. Especially since last time he woke everyone in the ark up by singing I'm a little teapot over the loud speaker.

Speaking of which the loud speaker is only to be used to broadcast messages of importance. So no singing, reading books or random comments. Especially if it is to one person.  
- Saying goodnight to the entire ark at three in the morning is not a good enough reason

Stop teaching the Dinobots klingon  
-why do I even need to say this?

When I ask you for a report or update you are not to reply " YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!" and run off

Don't sub-title the security footage and especially if its not what they are saying  
-also no adding audio from soap operas

Cheerleading while Optimus and Megatron are fighting is not appropriate; it is only distracting.  
-Also you should be fighting not throwing pompoms around

No re-painting yourself in neon yellow and blue. We are meant to be blending in not sticking out.  
- Also the Decepticons can find you easily  
-And it hurts my optics

Hacking Tellatran one and changing profiles around is only funny the first time.  
-Starscream is not a female Autobot and Ratchet is Definitely not the Decepticon Second in Command  
- Ratchet did not appreciate being attacked by the Arks defense system

Stop writing you're reports in clichés; Sunstreaker  
- Sideswipe; stop writing you're reports in  
- Everyone else don't even think about it

"…And then out of nowhere a wild Pikachu appeared" is not a reason for missing meetings.  
- You are not a Pokémon trainer  
- nor is "I died" a reasonable excuse


End file.
